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Married slice – Part I   |   Married slice – Part II

THEY SAY MARRIAGE IS LIKE A WATERMELON. DO YOU AGREE? HOW SO?
9 didn’t agree – 6 of them agreed that there is signs prior to marriage
8 (3 males+5 females) agreed
interesting answer:
YES I do. especialy if you didn’t exert enough effort to dig deeply and think thoroughly about the behaviour of your spouse and her/his family and its indicaitons.. This needs patience and alertness.

WHAT DO THINK ARE THE REASONS WHY DIVORCE RATES ARE VERY HIGH THESE DAYS?

Interesting answers:

Males

  • 1-media 2-marital laws favoring females
  • I think the number one is poor communication…Infidelity…change in priorities…Physical, emotional or sexual abuse…sexual problems… and money.
  • carelessness
  • The internet is making everything available and tempting. People are getting weaker in resisting temptations especially that they can see all what they like on the satellite.

Females

  • Because marriage comes easily. Families pay to get their kids married, and our generation didn’t learn what the word “responsibility” means. There’s no room here to elaborate, but I blame those who left their kids behind and traveled just to pile up money in the seventies.
  • Because when people search for love and not for life (personal favorite)
  • problems most of time need patience and this is not one of our time habits
  •  Marriage for wrong reasons from the beginning such as: Marriage because you want to just get married or you become old enough to get married,.. etc
  • Choosing your partner for the wrong reasons such as him being rich or her being pretty.
  •  Not understanding your fiancee, this is a very important one. In the engagement, we tend to live a very romantic year followed with a year full of arguments about the color of the walls and the design of the living room and we forget to discuss our shared interests , dreams and how we see our future together.
  •  Girls wanting to live at the same level (financially) as they were before marriage which is very difficult to achieve at the beginning.
  •  Spoiled boys or girls that just can’t be responsible.
  • Financial reasons !!!
  • Last but not least couples not communicating with each other and not willing to work out their marriage
  • My experience men dont realize that marriage isnt just about sex and fun, 2 late they see they wont have time 2 their friends, need 2 work a lot provide for wife, accept their wives mood swings when they r pregnant they see girls be4 marriage always pretty always having a fun time. once u married its not all about that. women might not be prepared too. but as i see it its mostly man who fail

WHEN DO YOU KNOW MARRIAGE DOES NOT WORK ANYMORE?
6 (3 male+3 female) think bad communication
2 (females) think when love and/or respect disappear
2 weren’t decisive.
Other interesting answers:

  • When sex stops
  • When it is not bringing out the best in you (personal favorite)
  • When i am sure that i worked hard enough to let it work but with no avail
  • When partners become stranger, when they don’t have to share any dream…

DO YOU BELIEVE THERE ARE PRE-MARRIAGE FAILURE INDICATIONS? EXPLAIN.
12 said yes
1 said no male
1 were indecisive
Interesting answers:

  • If there is no harmony between the person and his/her inlaws. This is a problem unless they live away. I know several cases that got divorced because of this.
  • If you realize that you really do not have any shared interests. Sometimes, he is great and she is great but they are just not so great together.
  • From some experiences, there’re signs of nervous or violent persons shown in the engagement period … people some how tend to ignore it and say it’s a matter of situation not a habit and blah blah
  • Poor or Miser person is shown with early signs, while greedy ones do too more like that
  • A momma’s boy is a deal breaker! (personal favorite)
  • Disrespect, lots of arguments, different values, morals and ethics.

KEEPING A MARRIAGE IS QUITE A CHALLENGE, WHAT KEEPS THE MARRIAGE GOING?
7 (1 male+6 females) think it’s love/hope/the will to be together
7 (2 males+5 females) think it’s understanding
3 (1 male+2 females) communication
5 (3 male+2 female)think it’s kids
5 (all female) think it’s forgiveness/scarification
2 (1 male+1 female) think it’s good sex
2 (all female) think it’s honesty/trust

Other interesting answers:

  • The fear of failure
  • Sometimes, Distraction. And as Stephen Covey used to say, “the main thing is to Keep the main thing the main thing”
  • The desire to continue being together despite all the waves
  • Religion

IF YOU HAVE AN ADVICE TO GIVE TO SINGLE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO GET MARRIED, WHAT WOULD THAT BE?

Males answers:

  • 1-know her first… 2- don’t marry bcoz ur physically attracted to her, unless u sleep with her first… 3- sex desire can hide behind false feelings of love… This false love usually disappears on the saba7eya
  • It’s a great and important step we have to get it, so please think twice and act wise.
  • Make sure it’s the right one from your point of view.. Not other’s
  • do it if u feel u will love it
  • Think a million times before you choose.

Female friends:

  • Follow your heart and your brain, both… you can’t keep a marriage if there’re no feelings also it can’t continue if there’re no respect or mental agreement and understanding
  • Let go of the bad stuff, deal with the important stuff and enjoy the good stuff. And don’t talk about your private issues with ANYONE and I mean NO ONE AT ALL. If you really need help try talking to a therapist, sheikh or someone like that. (personal favorite)
  • Think! And take your time. Lust fades and annoying habits get too annoying. If you can see yourself growing old with someone, despite their -say- snoring and horrible mood in the morning, go for it!
  • Ensure that you are completely convinced he/she is the one for you
  • enjoy your life before its too late, marriage sucks
  • You are not Kate Middleton, you have flaws too! Look at the good sides of the person and don’t get busy finding out his defects. He is not a dress. Besides, you can buy the palace later, start with a humble villa first!
  • Guys, She does not have to look like Nancy Agram, she won’t be dancing all day. She will be a loyal wife raising up your kids. There are much precious qualities than looks. Good God, how superficial are you !!
  • A friend of mine who is a n engineer got married to an accountant and everyone was against this because of the stupid cultural school hierarchy forced by the society, in which somehow the doctor is more valuable than an engineer, an engineer is more valuable than accountant, ..etc. She responded “Eza atakom man tardawho dinan fazawegoh”. She got married at 21 yrs and they live happily in Emirates with their boy and girl.
  • In laws, for god sake, stay away and it is not a bargain and you win if you pay less. It is someone that will be family.
  • اتقو الله فبعض وجددو نيتكو فالزواج .. هتفرق معاكم اكيد
  • Stay together as like couple no less 1 year. Only then get married or not.
  • test the person, see if u have the same goals, see if he/she respects u and ur dreams/wishes/decision
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